You may have seen headlines lately asking whether anorexia is really an addiction. If you or someone you love lives with anorexia, that question probably lands close to home. Restriction can feel like something you chose at first, and then like something that chose you. The pull to keep going can feel stronger than hunger, stronger than reason, stronger than the people asking you to stop.

So is anorexia an addiction? The short answer: researchers are studying the overlap, but anorexia is still classified as an eating disorder, not a substance or behavioral addiction. Here's what the research actually says, and what it means for you.

Where the addiction idea comes from

For years, clinicians have noticed that anorexia and addiction can look alike from the outside. Both involve a behavior that keeps going despite serious harm. Both involve loss of control, even when the person wants to stop. Both get more entrenched the longer they continue.

Researchers have started looking at what's happening in the brain to explain that overlap. Some studies suggest that, in anorexia, restricting food can start to activate the brain's reward system, the same system involved in substance use. Early on, restriction may bring a sense of relief or control that the brain learns to seek out. Over time, the behavior can shift from a choice to a compulsion that runs on its own.

Animal research points the same way. When food restriction is paired with exercise in lab settings, the pattern can become self-reinforcing and hard to interrupt. That's one reason you'll now see anorexia described in some journals as having "addiction-like" features.

This research matters. It helps explain why willpower alone rarely works, and why someone with anorexia can want recovery and still feel unable to eat.

Why it's not that simple

Despite the overlap, most eating disorder specialists are cautious about calling anorexia an addiction. The researchers studying the connection say the same thing: it's a useful lens, not a settled fact.

Here's the key difference. An addiction, like alcohol or gambling, involves a substance or activity you can stop. Food isn't something you can quit. Recovery from anorexia means learning to eat again, not learning to abstain. That changes everything about how treatment works.

Anorexia also carries things that addiction models don't fully capture: intense fear around weight and body shape, perfectionism, a deep need for control, and sometimes anxiety or trauma underneath. Treatment has to address those, not just the compulsive behavior.

One more point, because it matters. "Addiction" doesn't mean "not an illness." Addiction is a recognized medical condition. So the question was never "illness or addiction." It's whether the addiction lens helps us understand one serious illness a little better. Right now, the answer seems to be: partly, and carefully.

What this means for you

If the addiction research does one thing, it should be this: take the blame off you. If restriction has started to feel automatic and out of your hands, that isn't weakness or stubbornness. It's what a brain under starvation does. Understanding that is the first step toward treating yourself with the same care you'd offer a friend.

A few things that help, whether you're the person struggling or someone who loves them:

Stop arguing with the logic. Trying to reason someone out of anorexia - or reasoning with yourself - rarely works, because the pull isn't logical. Compassion gets further than debate.
Separate the person from the disorder. Many therapists teach clients to notice the "anorexia voice" as something distinct from their own values and wants. Naming it makes it easier to push back on.
Expect recovery to be gradual. Just as with addiction, entrenched patterns take time to loosen. Setbacks are part of the process, not proof it isn't working.
Don't try to do it alone. Anorexia has one of the highest mortality rates of any mental health condition. It is treatable, but it almost always needs professional support, often from a team that includes a therapist and a medical provider.

When to seek help

You don't need to meet a definition to deserve support. Reach out if any of these sound familiar:

Thoughts about food, eating, or your body take up a large part of your day.
You feel anxious, guilty, or out of control around eating, or you avoid situations that involve food.
Rules about what, when, or how much you eat have become hard to break, even when you want to.
Friends or family have expressed concern and you find yourself hiding or defending your eating.
You've noticed physical changes, feeling cold, dizzy, exhausted, or unwell, alongside changes in how you eat.

If you're worried about someone else, say so gently and without judgment. You don't need to have the right words. Showing up matters more than getting it perfect.

An eating disorder is a medical condition as well as a mental health one. If you're experiencing physical symptoms, see a doctor alongside a therapist.

You don't have to figure this out alone

If disordered eating has been affecting your daily life, talking to a professional can help. NCC offers therapy online across New York State, with licensed therapists who understand eating disorders and the anxiety, trauma, and self-esteem struggles that often travel with them. You'll always work with a real, licensed human therapist. Medicaid, Medicare and most insurance accepted. Call (718) 232 1351 to schedule an appointment.

October 1, 2026

How to Be More Patient with Yourself

Think about how you talk to a friend who is having a hard time. You listen. You remind them they're doing their best. You tell them it's okay to take a breath.

Now think about how you talk to yourself on a hard day. For most of us, it sounds very different.

Being patient with yourself isn't about lowering your standards. It's about treating yourself with the same compassion, respect and support you'd offer anyone else in our neighborhood. Here are four places to start.

1. Stop expecting instant progress

Healing and growth don't run on a schedule. You might have a great week and then a rough one. That isn't failure. That's what change actually looks like.

When you expect instant results, every slow day feels like proof that you're not trying hard enough. You are. Progress is often quiet. It shows up as a slightly calmer morning, or a hard conversation you handled a little better than last time.

Try this: When you catch yourself thinking "I should be past this by now," ask instead, "What's one thing that's a little easier than it was a month ago?"

2. Talk to yourself with kindness

The voice in your head is with you all day, every day. If it's harsh, that wears on you. If it's kind, it holds you up.

You don't have to believe every critical thought you have. Notice it. Then ask: would I say this to someone I love? If the answer is no, you don't have to say it to yourself either.

Try this: The next time you make a mistake, say out loud, "That was hard, and I'm still okay." It feels strange at first. It also works.

3. Focus on continuous small improvements

Big goals are good. Big goals with no steps in between are a setup for giving up.

You don't have to overhaul your life this week. You just have to do one small thing, and then do it again tomorrow. Ten minutes outside. One text to a friend. Going to bed 20 minutes earlier. Small steps add up, and they're a lot kinder to a tired mind than a total reset.

Try this: Pick one thing you can do in five minutes or less. Do it today. That's the whole assignment.

4. Rest without feeling guilty

Rest isn't a reward you earn after you've done enough. It's part of how you get anything done at all.

A lot of us carry a quiet rule that says sitting still is lazy. But your mind and body need downtime to recover, the same way a sore muscle does. Guilt doesn't make rest more productive. It just makes it less restful.

Try this: Schedule rest the way you'd schedule anything else that matters. Put it on the calendar. When the guilt shows up, remind yourself: this is the plan, not a detour from it.

You don't have to do this alone

Patience with yourself is a skill, not a personality trait. It gets easier with practice, and it gets easier with support.

If you're tired of being your own harshest critic, we're here. Our team of counselors, social workers and psychiatrists offers quality mental health care online, so there's no commute and no waiting room. We have evening and weekend hours, and we accept most major insurance.

Reach out when you're ready. We'll meet you there. With you in mind.

Book an appointment: (718) 232-1351

September 21, 2026

what can you do today

Some days, everything feels like too much. The to-do list keeps growing, your energy keeps shrinking, and "taking care of your mental health" sounds like one more thing you don't have time for.

Here's the good news: improving your mental health doesn't require a life overhaul. Small actions, done today, can shift how you feel - not by fixing everything, but by giving your mind and body a little of what they need.

Why small steps matter

When you're stressed or low, your brain narrows its focus to just getting through the day. Big goals like "exercise more" or "fix my sleep" feel impossible, so nothing happens and then you feel worse for not doing them.

Small steps break that cycle. They're doable even on a hard day, and each one sends your brain a signal: I can still take care of myself. That signal is where momentum starts.

Five things you can do today

1. Step outside for ten minutes. Daylight and movement are two of the most reliable mood-lifters we have. You don't need a workout - a slow walk around the block counts. If you can't get outside, sit near a window and stretch.

2. Do a two-minute reset. When your thoughts are racing, ground yourself in your senses. Name five things you can see, four you can hear, three you can touch. This pulls your attention out of the spiral and back into the present moment.

3. Reach out to one person. Isolation feeds low moods. Send one text - not a big catch-up, just "thinking of you" or "how's your week?" Connection doesn't have to be deep to help. It just has to happen.

4. Cross off one small task. Pick something that takes five minutes: answer that email, make the bed, put the dishes away. Finishing something - anything - counters the feeling of being stuck.

5. Give yourself a bedtime. Sleep affects mood more than almost anything else. Tonight, put your phone down 30 minutes earlier than usual. You don't need a perfect routine - just a slightly better night than last night.

What if I do these and still feel bad?

That's normal, and it doesn't mean you failed. These steps are supports, not cures. Some days they'll help a lot; some days they'll just help you get through. Both count.

The goal isn't to feel great by dinnertime. It's to stop the slide, one small choice at a time, and remind yourself that you have some say in how your day goes.

When to seek more support

Small daily steps are powerful, but they have limits. If low mood, anxiety, or stress has lasted more than a few weeks, keeps returning, or is interfering with your work, sleep, or relationships, it's worth talking to a professional.

That's not a last resort - it's the same logic as everything above. You're noticing what you need and doing something about it. A counselor is a skilled listener who can help you understand what's going on and build tools that fit your life.

If stress, anxiety, or low mood has been affecting your daily life, talking to a professional can help. Call (718) 313-4357 to schedule an appointment.

September 14, 2026

Healing from trauma: why acceptance isn’t approval

Healing from trauma: why acceptance isn't approval

Something happened to you. Maybe it was years ago, maybe more recently. And even though the event is over, it doesn't always feel over. A sound, a smell, an anniversary, or nothing at all can pull you right back into it.

If that sounds familiar, you're not broken and you're not weak. You're carrying something heavy. And healing from trauma is possible with the right support.

What trauma actually is

Trauma isn't defined by the event itself. It's defined by what the experience did to you. Two people can go through the same thing and come out affected in very different ways. There's no threshold your experience has to meet to "count."

When something overwhelms your ability to cope, your mind and body can stay stuck in protection mode long after the danger has passed. That can show up as:

Anxiety or feeling constantly on edge
Trouble sleeping
Feeling numb or disconnected
Avoiding certain places, people, or conversations
Strong reactions to things that seem small on the surface

None of that means something is wrong with you. It means your nervous system did its job during a terrible moment and hasn't gotten the message that the moment is over.

Why acknowledgement comes first

Many people spend years minimizing what happened to them. You might tell yourself it wasn't that bad, that others have it worse, or that you should be over it by now.

Minimizing feels like strength, but it usually keeps the wound open. You can't process something you won't let yourself name. Acknowledgement simply means being honest with yourself: something happened, and it affected me. That's it. It's not dwelling, and it's not weakness. It's the starting line.

Acceptance is not approval

This is where a lot of people get stuck, so let's be clear about what acceptance means in trauma recovery.

Accepting what happened does not mean saying it was okay. It doesn't mean forgiving anyone, forgetting anything, or deciding it didn't matter. It means accepting one specific fact: this is part of my story, and no amount of wishing will make it not have happened.

That distinction matters because fighting reality takes enormous energy. When you stop spending that energy on "it shouldn't have happened," you can start spending it on "what do I need now?" The past is part of your story. It isn't the whole of it.

A small practice you can start with

Recovery happens in therapy, but there are small things you can do between now and your first appointment. When a memory or feeling surges, try this:

Name it. Silently say to yourself, "I'm having a trauma response right now." Naming what's happening creates a little distance between you and the feeling.
Ground yourself in the present. Look around and name five things you can see, four you can hear, and three you can touch. This reminds your nervous system where and when you actually are.
Respond with kindness, not criticism. Instead of "why am I still like this," try "this makes sense, given what I went through." Self-blame slows healing. Compassion supports it.

This won't erase what happened, and it isn't a substitute for treatment. It's a way to steady yourself in hard moments.

What healing from trauma really looks like

Recovery from trauma isn't a straight line, and it isn't about erasing memories. It's about the past losing its grip on your present. Over time, with support, the memories become something you have rather than something that has you.

A trauma-informed therapist won't push you to relive anything before you're ready. Therapy moves at your pace. You set the speed, and you stay in control. Counselors don't tell you what to do. They listen, help you make sense of what you're carrying, and give you tools to manage it.

When to reach out for help

Consider talking to a professional if any of these are true:

Memories, nightmares, or flashbacks keep intruding on your daily life
You're avoiding people, places, or situations to keep feelings at bay
You feel numb, disconnected, or constantly on guard
You're using alcohol, food, or other habits to cope with the feelings
It's been months or years and things aren't getting easier

You don't need to be in crisis to deserve support. Reaching out isn't an admission that you failed to handle it alone. It's a decision to stop carrying it alone.

If trauma has been affecting your daily life, talking to a professional can help. NCC offers therapy online across New York State. Medicaid, Medicare and most insurance accepted.
Call (718) 232 1351 to schedule an appointment.

March 29, 2026

Online Support Group for Women 60+

December 30, 2025

Facing the New Year: When Hope and Pressure Show Up at the Same Time

At Neighborhood Counseling Group, we see it every January: the world flips the calendar, and suddenly everyone’s supposed to feel motivated, optimistic, and ready to “level up.”

But that’s not how real life works.
For a lot of people, the new year doesn’t feel like a fresh start. It feels heavy. Reflective. Unsettling. And sometimes lonely. If that’s you, you’re not broken; you’re human.

The Quiet Pressure of “Starting Over”

New Year messaging is loud: New goals. New habits. New you.

What rarely gets talked about is how much pressure that creates.

The new year naturally invites reflection. You look back at what didn’t work, what hurt, what you lost, what you didn’t finish. Old grief, unresolved conflict, burnout, and regret can surface — not because you’re failing, but because your nervous system finally has space to breathe after the chaos of the holidays.

That pause can be uncomfortable.

When Motivation Is Low (and That’s Okay)

There’s a myth that January should feel energizing. For many people, it’s actually the opposite.

Winter slows things down. Days are shorter. Energy dips. Emotions feel closer to the surface. Expecting yourself to suddenly operate at peak performance ignores biology, mental health, and lived experience.

You don’t need a five-year plan right now.
You don’t need a perfect routine.
You don’t need to reinvent yourself.

Sometimes the most honest goal is simply: keep going.

A Gentler Way to Enter the Year

Instead of asking, “What should I fix?” try asking:

What do I need more of this year?
What drained me last year that I don’t want to carry forward?
What would feeling steadier look like, not better, just steadier?

Growth doesn’t always look like big change. Often it looks like boundaries, rest, and learning to respond differently to the same old patterns.

Therapy Isn’t About Reinventing Yourself

At Neighborhood Counseling Group, we don’t believe therapy is about becoming someone else.

It’s about understanding yourself more deeply.
It’s about noticing patterns without judgment.
It’s about building tools that actually fit your life, not someone else’s highlight reel.

Whether you’re entering the year feeling hopeful, anxious, numb, or all of the above, therapy can be a space where you don’t have to perform optimism or have everything figured out.

If the New Year Feels Heavy, You’re Not Alone

You don’t need to rush this season.
You don’t need to be “on.”
You don’t need to have clarity yet.

The new year isn’t a deadline, it’s a doorway. You get to walk through it at your own pace.

If you’re looking for support as you navigate what this year is stirring up, we’re here. Quietly. Consistently. Without pressure. Sometimes facing the new year isn’t about starting over, it’s about finally showing up for yourself where you are.

December 10, 2025

Why the End of the Year Brings Up Old Trauma and Unresolved Feelings

And how to take care of yourself through it.

As the year winds down, most of us feel the pressure to “wrap things up,” be festive, and stay upbeat. But for many people, this season brings something very different: unexpected heaviness, old memories resurfacing, or emotions that feel out of nowhere.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.
There are real psychological reasons why the end of the year can stir up unresolved feelings and understanding them can help you move through the season with more clarity and compassion for yourself.

The Year-End Pause Creates Space for Reflection

Throughout the year, life moves quickly. We’re focused on deadlines, responsibilities, and day-to-day survival. When things finally slow down in December, even just a little our brains naturally shift into reflection mode.

That quiet space can bring up things we didn’t have time to feel earlier grief we pushed aside, stress that built up, or moments that didn’t get closure. Reflection isn’t the problem. It’s the pressure to feel “happy” while reflecting that creates emotional conflict.

Holidays Can Reactivate Old Family Dynamics.

Even if you don’t physically see family, the idea of the holidays can trigger memories and beliefs learned long ago:

feeling responsible for keeping the peace
feeling unseen or unheard
childhood stress around conflict, alcohol, or unpredictability
grief over people who are no longer here
unmet expectations or pressure to perform emotionally

These emotional imprints can show up years later, especially during a season centered around family, connection, and tradition.

Trauma Remembers Anniversaries, Even When You Don’t

Our bodies store timelines.
If something difficult happened in a past December, a loss, breakup, crisis, major transition, the nervous system can quietly reactivate around the same time of year.

You might notice:

restlessness
irritability
sudden anxiety
fatigue
emotional sensitivity

You may not consciously link it to the past, but your body does.

The Pressure to “End Strong” Can Intensify Shame and Self-Judgment

Social media, work culture, and even well-meaning friends often push the idea that December should be a month of:

reflection
gratitude
goal-setting
finishing unfinished tasks

But if you’ve had a hard year, or several, this pressure can feel overwhelming.

It can stir up old beliefs about “not doing enough,” “falling behind,” or “not being where you should be.” Those messages often trace back to earlier experiences of criticism or unrealistic expectations.

Loneliness and Disconnection Feel Sharper in Contrast

This season puts connection on a pedestal: families gathering, friends celebrating, partners exchanging gifts. When your life doesn’t look like that, or even if it does, but still feels complicated, the sense of loneliness can hit harder.

Loneliness often unlocks deeper emotions that we’ve been carrying quietly all year.

How to Support Yourself Through It

You’re not supposed to just “push through.” There are ways to make this season gentler and more grounded.

Name what’s coming up
Putting language to your emotions reduces their intensity.
Try: “I’m feeling overwhelmed because this time of year brings back X.”
Lower the pressure, emotionally and socially
You’re allowed to keep plans simple, set boundaries, or say no entirely.
Create new rituals that feel safe for you
raditions don’t have to be tied to the past.
A walk, a quiet movie night, or choosing your own form of comfort can shift the emotional tone.
Check in with your nervous system
Slow breathing, grounding exercises, and sensory techniques help your body feel safe again — especially when old trauma patterns show up.
Reach out for support
Talking to a therapist can help you understand the roots of what you’re feeling and develop tools to move through it without feeling alone.

You’re Not “Going Backwards.” Your Mind Is Asking for Care.

When old wounds resurface, it isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of unmet needs rising to the surface. The end of the year gives those feelings room to breathe.

If this season is bringing up more than you expected, BCS Counseling Group is here to help. You deserve support, comfort, and space to heal, not pressure to “be okay.”

Please call: 718 232 1351 or go to: nccny.com

November 29, 2025

Navigating the Space Between Thanksgiving & Christmas

A gentler way to move through a hectic season.

The weeks after Thanksgiving can feel like a whiplash moment, one minute you’re cozy, full, maybe even a little sentimental… and the next, it’s holiday lights, crowded inboxes, financial pressure, family expectations, and a calendar that somehow filled itself overnight.

If this time of year feels overwhelming, you’re not alone. Many people experience heightened stress, emotional fatigue, or unexpected feelings of sadness during this “in-between” season. It’s a lot, and it’s okay to acknowledge that.

Here are a few ways to navigate this stretch with more compassion and a little more breathing room:

Slow the pace, even if the world won’t.

You don’t have to match the holiday rush. Create small pauses: a longer shower, a quiet cup of coffee, a walk, five minutes of deep breathing. Tiny resets add up, especially when everything around you feels like it’s moving too fast.

Set boundaries early.

Before December gets into full swing, decide what’s actually realistic for you. That might mean fewer commitments, shorter visits, smaller gatherings, or saying “I can’t this time.”
Boundaries aren’t about shutting people out, they’re about protecting your energy so you can show up in ways that feel healthy.

Acknowledge any mixed emotions.

This season isn’t joyful for everyone. Maybe you’re missing someone. Maybe family dynamics are complicated. Maybe finances feel tight.

Whatever you’re carrying, give yourself permission to feel it without judgment. Your emotional experience is valid, even if it doesn’t match the holiday soundtrack playing in every store.

Reconnect to what you want the season to mean.

Strip away the expectations for a moment. what actually matters to you?
Connection? Rest? Spiritual reflection? Creativity? Community?
Let that guide your choices instead of pressure or tradition.

Reach out if you need support.

You don’t have to hold everything by yourself. Talking to a therapist can help you find clarity, manage stress, and navigate family or emotional challenges with more steadiness.

BCS Counseling is here with flexible online sessions, evening and weekend availability, and a team committed to care that fits your life.

A softer holiday season is possible.

You deserve a December that feels grounding, meaningful, and manageable ,not one that drains you. Start with small steps, honest emotions, and support when you need it.

We’re here for you. 💛

October 8, 2025

Who Might Benefit from Psychiatry assisted therapy?

Psychiatry-assisted therapy, which typically involves a combination of psychiatric care, therapy, and in some cases medication management.

Individuals with Mental Disorders: People diagnosed with mental health disorders such as depression, anxiety disorders (like generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, or PTSD), bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, OCD, etc., can benefit significantly from psychiatry-assisted therapy. Psychiatrists can prescribe medications to manage symptoms while also coordinating therapy to address underlying issues.
Patients Requiring Medication Management: Individuals who require ongoing management of psychiatric medications, such as adjusting dosages or switching medications due to side effects or lack of efficacy, benefit from the expertise of psychiatrists.
Complex Cases: Patients with complex mental health conditions that may require a combination of medication and therapy to achieve optimal outcomes can benefit greatly. Psychiatrists can provide integrated treatment plans tailored to individual needs.
Co-occurring Disorders: Individuals with co-occurring disorders (e.g., substance use disorders alongside mental health disorders) often benefit from comprehensive psychiatric care that addresses both conditions simultaneously.
Treatment-Resistant Cases: Patients who have not responded adequately to initial treatments or have treatment-resistant symptoms can benefit from the specialized knowledge and experience of psychiatrists in exploring alternative treatment options.
Prevention of Relapse: Psychiatry-assisted therapy is crucial for individuals who have experienced relapses or are at risk of relapse in their mental health conditions. Psychiatrists can monitor and adjust treatment plans to reduce the likelihood of relapse.
Early Intervention: Early intervention in mental health conditions can prevent worsening of symptoms and improve long-term outcomes. Psychiatrists play a key role in diagnosing and initiating treatment early on.
Support for Families: Family members of individuals with mental health disorders can benefit from psychiatry-assisted therapy by gaining understanding and strategies to support their loved ones effectively.
Chronic Conditions: Patients with chronic mental health conditions that require ongoing monitoring and management benefit from the continuity of care provided by psychiatrists.
Personalized Care: Psychiatry-assisted therapy allows for personalized treatment plans tailored to the specific needs, preferences, and circumstances of each individual.

Psychiatry-assisted therapy is essential for individuals requiring medication management, comprehensive treatment plans, and specialized care for a wide range of mental health conditions. It integrates psychiatric expertise with therapeutic interventions to promote recovery and improve quality of life. All of NCC care plans include both Psychiatry and Therapy.

September 10, 2025

the benefits of female therapists for women

An article by Nicoletta Pallotta, MD, LCSW.

The challenges that women deal with are often directly related to their gender; sexism, stereotyping, motherhood, childbirth issues, infertility struggles etc.

As a society we like to think that we’ve achieved ‘equality’, but the truth is the way women experience life and are perceived in life, is still very different to men.

Traditionally perceived gender roles are something we’ll never truly escape. There is inherent pressure on women to balance career and family, and this is something that affects women across the globe. If you have children, you probably undergo immense guilt when unavoidable parental obligations interrupt your working day, even if a 60-hour week is your norm, deep down you may still think this way. All this in addition to the general predicament of feeling undervalued both at home and at work.

If you feel like you need help in dealing with any aspect of life, there’s a lot to be said for talking to someone of the same sex. Female therapists get it, because they live it. They understand. This is not to say that male therapists aren’t amazing and don’t add value, but when you’re dealing with sensitive subjects that are unique to women (and even when you’re not) it can be comforting, and easier to talk to a female counselor who can personally relate to much of what you’re going through.

Is anorexia an addiction? What the research says